Sundays...

Sundays used to be my favorite day of the week.  Sunday has a different feel than any other day of the week.  Think about it.  Monday, we gear up with dread for working 5 days in a row.  Tuesday, we accept it, Wednesday we get hopeful as the weekend approaches, Thursdays can be fun, and because it's almost Friday if you wanted to partake in a little pre-weekend fun, Thursday's a good night to do it:  We can justify the hangover, knowing that once we get through Friday we have two days to recover.  Saturdays have an excitement attached to them.  We go shopping with friends, we piddle around the yard, clean the house....but Sundays, they are different.  If you by-pass the whole church thing, you sleep a little later, linger over your coffee longer, read the paper, maybe even watch a football game in your PJs.  I almost never take a shower until noon.

These days, Sundays are pretty much the same as any other day of the week.  I can hardly tell the difference, except that my friends are more accessible.  But, still, I remain true to the feel of Sundays.  I try to sleep a little later.  I can be more productive on Sundays than any other day of the week, doing laundry, going grocery shopping...getting out of bed.  The truth is, I miss Sundays with my ex.   I miss morning sex and showering together.  I miss him making breakfast for me.  I miss watching the NFL pre-show with him as he complained about the Seahawks' loss from the week before.  I miss sharing coffee with him while we read the Sunday paper.    I believe at some point I will have these and new rituals with someone again, but for now, Sundays are lonely, and  try always have plans on Sundays so I don't think about how Sundays used to feel. 

The best part of Sundays now, is the lack of guilt I feel if I don't do anything productive at all.  I have been known to watch movies all day, but I try not to do this very often because it usually equates to large portions of food being consumed, including chips, cookies and Haagen Daaz Pineapple coconut ice cream. 

I still like Sundays, despite the lonliness.  I have become comfortable with my own company. Although I miss the old Sunday rituals I used to have, I don't miss them enough to go back.  Even though I left my marriage to forge ahead alone in a new city,  I am never really alone.  I have a dog, and he loves Sundays too, and together, we are making new rituals.